The National Rifle Association (1871-2012)

National_Rifle_Association (Photo credit: ChrisWaldeck)

On international television, with the world waiting to hear from the foremost organization dedicated to the proposition that every person must be armed with high powered assault weapons, the NRA suddenly took their own life today due to a self-inflicted wound to the head.

“The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun,” Wayne LaPierre said at a Washington press event, adding, “With all the money in the federal budget can’t we afford to put a police officer in every single school?”

Going on, he added that every school must become an armed prison and that the only way to solve gun violence was through more guns.

“I call on Congress today to act immediately to appropriate whatever is necessary to put armed police officers in every single school in this nation,” he said.

It would seem that these were his final words as even many of the more conservative thinkers in this country simply gave up any hope of life support, turned, and walking out of the insane asylum into the warm sunlight of rational freedom.

The NRA was founded in 1871 by former Union General Ambrose Burnside who had lamented that not enough people had died during the war given the amount of ammunition wasted. His goal was to create marksmen in order to take more lives in future wars. Only in recent years, did the NRA turn to supporting programs aimed at redefining the second amendment.

They will not be missed.

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5 Replies to “The National Rifle Association (1871-2012)”

  1. You may be a bit hasty in writing this obituary. Around these parts we have a number of sherriffs planning to do precisely that. I heard a couple of these announcements on the local news last night … before the NRA statement.

    1. But for how long?

      They’re probably not going to be there permanently. Even if they are, bear in mind that there was a sheriff’s deputy in Columbine High School that day, too.

      The permanent solution to the problem at hand is not armed guards. Really, that’s a formula for an arms race. If we accept the NRA’s argument that bad guys will always find a way to commit their crimes, then if there’s a deputy on-site they’ll just come in body armor and bigger numbers, right?

      Unless we’re going to assign Marine platoons to each school it’s unlikely that the good guys automatically outgun the bad guys.

      I think that a different solution is in order.

    1. that brings back memories!

      First, this is 2012, and that was 1 year after Columbine, the most recent school massacre in recent memory. Not only that, if memory, serves, the communities were selected based on certain criteria.

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