If you seek me…

Hagia Sophia ; Empress Zoë mosaic : Christ Pan...
Hagia Sophia ; Empress Zoë mosaic : Christ Pantocrator; Istanbul, Turkey (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I had said that I was finished with blogging here, but something has struck me and it seems only proper to share.  Like most of the moments of understanding that I have, it came accidentally…most likely because when I am not paying attention, I get out of the way of the Spirit and let it do it’s thing. So, a story of my day yesterday…

I went to the local Asian fest with a neighbor and her out of town guest. My neighbor is Samantha, Sam or short, but she used to be something quite different, specifically a male. I have no interest to talk about the morality of the situation except to say that my thoughts and positions on the matter have not changed. That really isn’t the point of the story anyway. Incidentally, the Asian fest was a lot of fun with good company and good conversation.

Once I got home, I began to reflect on the afternoon/evening as is my habit and the words of Jeremiah 29:13 came to mind. (As a side note, this is why a study of scripture is important. The more of the word of God that you are familiar, the more chances the Spirit has to teach you). I know the context of the story, but also the spirit of it. The spirit of the story is fairly simple. If you seek God, He will ensure that you find him. I attempt to do this in my life and often fail, but yesterday I did not.

While contemplating the day, I found my mind drifting to thoughts of transformation and my struggles with it. Not the concept of transformation or the lip service that many of us pay to it, but real and genuine transformation. The type of transformation that makes something new. Something different. A new identity and a new outlook and goal. I realized that while transformation is the goal, I can not see it. When I look in the mirror, the first thing that I see is the same violent and drug addicted kid. The oldest sins committed in the newest ways. The wreckage of a life that caused so much harm. I can talk about transformation and being a new creation, but really, I don’t see it. Not in myself. I trust that God is completing the good work He began in me (when I get out of the way and let Him any way), but I can not see the transformation. Then there is Sam…

Samantha understands transformation far better than i do. She is legitimately a new creation in the eyes of this world. She is something different than she was. When Samantha looks in the mirror, she does not see what was, she sees what is. She sees who she has become, not who she had been. Got to admit, I am somewhat jealous of that. I desperately wish that I could see that in myself. I have got a handle on Jesus, but understanding transformation eludes me. Sam has a handle on transformation, but having a handle on Jesus eludes her.

So, what is the point? It’s simple really…see, I found a glimpse of God in a heathen transsexual who has a better grasp on the transformation that is a bedrock of Christian faith. I found that because I genuinely try to seek God so that I may find him. I fail at that a lot, but sometimes I manage. If all of us are trying to seek God, I think we would be amazed where He would reveal Himself. If you doubt me, ask Balaam how he encountered God, (Numbers 22:28) I imagine he was rather surprised as well. There is more to this realization on my part though…

I am seeking God and have a handle on Jesus but I am bogged down in the struggle of transformation, not because God is struggling, but because I can not see it or recognize in myself. I have to believe that there are many others struggling with the same thing (that belief helps, as no one desires to struggle alone). If that belief is true is it any wonder that our churches struggle as well? If we can not recognize and allow our personal transformation toward the likeness of Christ, then our churches will suffer in realizing their continual transformation closer to the perfect bride of Christ. Sam understands transformation, but she has no idea who she is seeking. Is it any wonder she can not find Him? I do believe that this is also a struggle of many in the church. We all claim to be seeking God, but do we honestly do it with all our being? If not, can we really expect to find Him?

I don’t agree with Sam’s choice. What I know is that Sam’s choice did lead to transformation, so that means that she already understand the hardest part of the faith to me. There is a lesson there for me about transformation. I have a good grasp on Jesus. If I can somehow manage to convey that grasp of the risen Lord to Sam, she begin to seek God as well and begin the path toward becoming more and more like Jesus. If you didn’t know better it sounds like a bad and offensive joke: “A heathen transsexual and a Christian go to the local carnival…” instead it was an amazing lesson about faith. Let’s seek God with all our being so that we may find Him wherever and in whomever He chooses to reveal himself. Let’s recognize transformation in ourselves so that in doing so we can be a catalyst for transformation in our churches and beyond. Let’s learn a lesson from Sam…let’s seek and be genuinely transformed into something so new and so different that the world we are in would not recognize it.

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4 Replies to “If you seek me…”

  1. SCOTT

    I just read your post on “If youseek me” in the post you said, “I have a handle on Jesus, but i dont see the transformation in myself”.
    The Bible says, If you believe in your heart that God raised Jesus from the dead, and confess Him as Lord you are saved. As our Lord said to Martha, ” I am the Resurrection and the life” The transformation you seek is in the Resurrection. The same Spirit that raised Jesus from the dead dwells in YOU. We are seated with Him, (who? our resurrected savior) in heavenly places, far above all creation, including drug addicted, violent Scott. Not only are you no longer who you were you are no longer of this world, but a citizen of the next world, the new heaven and new earth, if you are in Christ. Oh yeh, and it is going to take you more than this life time to have a handle on Jesus, because He is God, and no offense creature, you dont have a handle on God.

    1. Daniel, I am well aware of the power of the Resurrection. I am also well aware that Christianity is not a magic wand that you wave and are suddenly a new and better person. Yes, there is definitely the assurance of Resurrection and salvation, but that is not the end of the transformation, it is the beginning. I think that perhaps you missed the point here which was that, at our best, Christians should demonstrate such a transformation in their life after an encounter with the living Christ that we should not be recognized as the same by those around us. Indeed, we are all new people as Paul would say, but if no one around us notices that then I think that we have missed a rather significant part of the purpose of transformation.

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