How to save money at #SBLAAR

At the end of this week, SBLAAR starts. To help those first time travellers make the most of it, and in light of the recession, I’ve put together several ways to say money at SBL.

  1. Get a roommate or several.
  2.  Food in these big cities is much more expensive than your hometown soda jerk shop. To save money on food, replace one to two meals with a liquid diet. But you have to make sure the liquid is filling. So, use beer. Beer is basically watered down bread, right? So, you find one with lots of hops that way it is like eating whole-grain bread. Not only will this fill you up, but it will make you forget about your hunger pains.
  3. A second way to save on food is to share food with your roommate. For instance, on Saturday morning, he goes and buys a breakfast and brings it back to the hotel room. I wouldn’t advise you to do this next step in public. What you need to do is to momma-bird-style feed the breakfast to your roommate. You chew it up and then like a momma bird, regurgitate it back into your roommate’s mouth. This way, you get some of the nutrients, and even some food particles, for yourself and so does your roommate.
  4. Wear your roommate’s clothes. That way, you can back less.
  5. Take showers with your roommate. This saves on water, soap, and shampoo.
  6. You can actually make money at SBL as well. As you know, there are a lot of fans of Tom Wright at SBL. Out of the 15,000 that will show up, 14,999 of them will be his fans. I’m pretty sure Wright invented SBL as his fan club. So, you print fake tickets and sell them. These tickets should be numbered 6 out of 10, 9 out of 11, and 3 out of 4. Sell them individually. What are you selling? Tickets to have a private dinner-date with Tom Wright. This will net you enough money to buy at least one discounted Brill title. 

I hope this helps.

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4 Replies to “How to save money at #SBLAAR”

  1. “But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where Joel was: and when he saw Joel, he was moved with compassion, and came to Joel, and bound up his wounds, pouring on them oil and beer; and he set Joel on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of Joel. And on the morrow he took out two shillings, and gave them to the host, and said, Take care of Joel.” May you meet a Samaritan on your journey to SBL, and not a priest or Levite.

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